Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Drowning in Feelings

It hit me like a tonne of bricks last night over dinner - at this point next week, we will already be in Baker Lake and starting our new lives. It's a scary realization to have over a pint of beer, let me tell you.

It's been an emotional few days, and I anticipate it will only get harder as our departure draws closer. Friday was my last day at work; bittersweet to say goodbye to good friends and comfortable surroundings, but at the same time, I really felt like it was time to move on. It is time to spread my wings and take the next step in my career, even if it is a scary, unknown step.

My sister came home this weekend and we got to see her a few times. We had a wonderful family dinner on the one night for mom's birthday and then we also saw her for brunch the day she left. As this was going to be the only time we saw her before we leave, it turned into a tear-filled visit for most of the weekend. Even now, I get tears in my eyes thinking of how much I'm going to miss her. :(

I know that this is only the beginning of a string of tough goodbyes, and I'm not sure I am hydrated enough to handle the onslaught of tears that are on their way. It is tough to remind yourself you're making the right choice when your heart is in so much pain. We are blessed to have such wonderful people in our lives who are supportive of our decision, but it doesn't lessen the heaviness in our hearts as we get ready to go. I don't regret our decision, and I'm still extremely excited, but it still hurts.

As we wrap up this final week in Ontario, surrounded by the people we love, I'm again reminded of how lucky we are to have the lives we do. Love is such a wonderful thing.

-L

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